Some Things of Interest

In my high school creative writing class we had an excersise where we would scan the newspaper, find the nuttiest or most outlandish story, and then write a back story for the participants. I give you Luann McKinnley.

A little football: Yes the season is over. No matter how spectacularly it ended, there is a place in the heart of even the most dedicated Alabama fan that wants to go back to September and experience the thrill of watching a live game without knowing the outcome ahead of time. For all those whose muscle memory is still causing you to enter 206 on your remotes, I remind you that, even in the offseason, there is still competition. The Fulmer Cup is on! Named for legendary disciplinarian Philip Fulmer, this brain child of Spencer Hall (aka Orson Swindle) from is awarded to the team whose current players tally the most points awarded for off season criminal arrests. The bar was set high last year by Auburn, who won with an unprecedented 81 points (The previous high was 31 points) and claimed the first Switzer Slam (winning the National Championship, Heisman Trophy, and Fulmer Cup in the same year.) Those interested in the history of the Fulmer Cup, go here. Don’t forget to pick you favorite for the Ellis T. Jones III Award for individual achievement. South Carolina’s Byron Jerideau has opened up the scoring with 2 points for disorderly conduct. Well played sir.

Here are a few Alabama football links in the wake of championship #14. A.J. McCarron’s unfathomable chest tatoo can be yours!  We finally made The Onion. And this has nothing to do with Alabama, but the shadow over Paterno’s legacy is getting darker and darker.

In that glorious moment between reading the headline and reading the article, I thought this was real. It was obviously too good to be true. For those that think I should have realized immediately that it was a spoof: this.

If this works I’m totally growing a pony tail.

I’m glad that the tourism board is promoting Birmingham’s restaurants in 2012 because we really do have some amazing places to eat at almost every price point (why can’t I get a decent piece of fish – no grease – for under ten dollars?). I suspect that the ads will be sleek shots of unique, local dishes, professionally photographed, much like the ones you will find on this website. I wish that there was a way to advertise the table service. I have found the service in other cities to be lacking when compared to what we are used to here. Of course there are individual waiters who have disappointed me here and individual restaurants in other cities that have exemplary service. But the mean in Birmingham is high. This is not the case with national chains located in Birmingham because they are working off a training program from elsewhere. I’ve noticed that as we get more and more corporate restaurants in town the overall level of service is diminishing. I think that might be because these national chains are the resume fillers of more and more waiters who want to do fine dining. They are taught to upsell (Them: “Wouldn’t you rather have a Woodford Reserve?” Me: “No. I’m thirty-eight years old. I know what I want to drink. Besides, that’s not even the same thing. Bring me Jameson!”) and greet the table based on a peppy “Hi my name is” script that dies a sad death when performed for the umpteenth time on a given night. Sitting for five minutes before being recognized is expected at Longhorn Steaks, not at a local. I may be wrong about this, but that’s my two cents.

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